Sticky, SLADE and Stupid Muscles

May I introduce my newest of good friends, dear anonymous ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce you to Sticky!

Sticky is quite a gregarious soul and likes to take me out to places (provided they are in Streatham). I made Sticky's acquaintance yesterday and brought him home to live with me. Sticky's favourite hobbies are standing up and making a noise when he hits the pavement (he loves making a noise). And, of course, he's the latest gentleman's accessory for strolling round town. I'm sure we'll get on famously.

SLADE have rarely been off the CD deck or iPod since the joys of SLADE Day. If anything the records just keep on getting better. The sound quality is excellent and I'm quite fond of the SLADE ALIVE! double anthology of their live material - they were truly a great live band. And I'm sure they've contributed to my improving health.

But now I'm anxious for the four-CD box set in September. What will be on it? what photos will be in the booklet? will there be 'new' material not previously available? I need to know...

After the joys of the magick pill on Monday evening when I felt a dramatic improvement in my back I've gone down hill again. Spent most of Tuesday in bed (which isn't good for the back at all) since I was so tired after the weekend and Murderous Monday, not being able to sit, stand, lie down or walk, changing position every few minutes. That was awful. Wednesday saw a trip to St George's to see the liver man (if one more doctor says I should lose weight I'll punch them - is that's all it takes to be a doctor these days?) and yet more blood tests (seven phials of blood this time, the bastard vampires). And a trip to see a physio to 'open' up my back. And another trip to the physio today, pulling down my trousers and pants (as Russell Brand says) and giving my lower back and bum a good old kneading!

I have stupid muscles. Okay, let's be fair, they're well meaning and have simply got it wrong. I've done something to my dodgy disc that's moved it slightly and it's pressing on the sciatic nerve which is agony enough so my lovely muscles in my back and left leg go into spasm and clasp the nerve tightly to protect it. That's a nice thing to do but it's also wrong cos it's agony! The trick is to 'open up' the muscles, relax them so that the nerve can move again. So, in trying to protect me the muscles are doing the exact opposite. My left calf is rock solid and so is most of my back and that's what makes it painful to move. My thigh and foot are numb or tingling (it varies). And that's on top of the pain from the nerve. Ouch. That's how I think of it anyway. And that's what the physio does, releases the muscles and tries to get everything back into balance so the body can heal itself.

I just wish my muscles were more intelligent ...