We have this deal you see - I buy your records and gig tickets and you tell me when you've got a new record out or are playing in my town. What's the point of signing up to your email list and suchlike if you don't talk to me? Well, I find things out anyway and I've booked tickets to see you at the Royal Albert Hall on 23 May. You tried to sneak that one past me didn't you?
I will expect a rousing rendition of 'Lola' ("that fag song").
And after this tour please prepare a cast recording of 'Come Dancing' or record the songs yourself. Thank you.
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