I Have A Life Too...

You might think we're heading into the season to be merry, but I think we're in the season of the reality game show. We've had 'Strictly Come Dancing' and 'X-Factor' for a few weeks now, and we've just seen the start of 'I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here', three prime-time telly programmes designed to keep us occupied on the long, cold and damp winter nights. Personally, I'm enjoying Sue Perkins and Giles Coren in 'Live The Good Life' which has some genuine originality and humour at its core.

It's really odd the way we seem to invest so much in people simply because they're on telly for a few weeks. I accidentally caught 'X-Factor' and saw the unfortunate Aidan get voted off and was astonished the following morning to see the vengeful anger on Twitter. People seemed to be angry and in tears about this boy who (a) couldn't sing and (b) couldn't talk but (c) could pull faces in answer to questions like 'how do you feel?'. I think it's quite easy to be able to tell whether someone can sing - it's called carrying a tune - and he clearly couldn't, but people still got upset. I don't understand.

I find myself getting really annoyed with the judges and their stupid comments about how someone who can barely hold a tune 'owned the stage', how we're finally seeing 'the real you' and how they've 'got it all and they 'are a star'. I think that's all just plain cruel. How many people from these types of talent shows go on to have a career? Very few. So why do these stupid judges build them up when it's plain as dish water that few of them can actually sing. As Damon Albarn said the other day, it's a karaoke coliseum - there's no originality or real talent, just a bunch of hopefuls singing other peoples' songs and if that's not karaoke I don't know what is. Cut back on the light show and the hoards of dancers and it might be a showcase for talent - but I doubt it. It's a marketing dream and is all about money.

I never used to watch 'celebrity' shows like 'Strictly' and 'I'm A Celeb' but they've developed a sort of morbid fascination for me and I now tend to watch the first episode when we meet all the s'lebs knowing that I'll be saying 'who's he?' and 'what's she famous for?' as they're introduced. There are too many soap and reality TV 'stars' taking their moment of glory before fading back into their character or obscurity (whichever). Still, at least they grab their 15 minutes and try to milk it for all it's worth.

Then there are some real stars and I can't help but wonder why on earth they are on these shows. There's the lovely Felicity Kendall demonstrating her flexibility on 'Strictly'. Now, she may not be the best dancer (OK, let's be honest, she's not) but she has 40 years behind her on TV and stage and even starred in a film about her own family back in the 60s. And she's incredibly bendy. There's also Pamela Stephenson who seems to be known as Billy Connolly's wife these days, but I remember her from 'Not The Nine O'Clock News' way back when. And she is a good dancer.

There are a few real s'lebs on 'I'm a Celebrity', like Nigel Havers and Shaun Rider but most mean nothing to me and, quite frankly, I'm not interested in any of them although it's nice to see those cheeky Geordie lads, Ant & Dec, on telly again. I do like a bit of Ant & Dec now and then. I only started watching 'I'm A Celeb' when a certain John Lydon went on it and got pecked at by ostriches or emus or something, and, of course, George Takei aka the immortal Mr Sulu.

I am weak and will probably watch on and off over the next few weeks - some things are inevitable...