'Avenue Q' at Wyndham's Theatre

What do you do after a long day? You wander down to Avenue Q of course - all life is there. I first saw the show in New York in 2005 and then twice in 2006 when it came to London - I can't believe it's four years since I last saw the show. It's full of life and laughter and no little wisdom (in the shape of the Bad Idea Bears, my heroes).

I don't know what it is about the show but I had a big ole smiley grin on my face throughout, learning how it sucks to be me, about Lucy The Slut, about racism and the true purpose of the Internet. And, strangely, we were in Row Q of the stalls. In front of us was row upon row of young men in suits - was it some kind of conference evening out or something? and why did they have a stuffed badger? Um... moving on ...

The stars of the show are, of course, the puppets, but some of the characters are actually human and I was pleased to see Delroy Atkinson playing Gary Coleman - Delroy played Hamilton in Ray Davies's 'Come Dancing' at Stratford East, one of my favourite theatrical experiences in recent years. I also liked Jaqueline Tate who had a nice presence and a nice voice as Christmas Eve. Of course, I couldn't possibly comment on Kate and Princeton having sex on stage, rather loudly I might add.

Lucy The Slut always makes her mark with swaying hips and swinging bosoms and Trekkie as the porn king, but it's the Bad Idea Bears that I love. They are full of advice on how buying more beer makes it cheaper and, if you need to commit suicide, they helpfully have a rope, and always with a smile on their faces. Luckily I have my own Bad Idea Bear.

Everyone should see 'Avenue Q' at least once in their lives.

'Sister Act' at The London Palladium

Last evening I was treated to a performance of 'Sister Act' at The Palladium. I've been meaning to see it for ages but not got round to it until last night. You know the story - no, I won't believe you if you say you've not seen the film - and the stage show is close enough to the film that you'll know what's happening but I didn't find that a problem at all. If anything, I kept wondering how they'd do the next scene...

They generally did the next scene with a massive set change, with different sets appearing and disappearing seemingly with every blink - this is a show that needs a *big* stage, with gothic columns appearing from above the stage, disco scenes twisting round on a turntable, a giant madonna figure popping up amidst massive stained glass windows - the producers certainly didn't stint on scenery. And the costumes got ever more elaborate as the show progresses until the nuns end up dancing round in silver and gold lame habits. Yes, it's all in there somewhere, although I didn't notice a kitchen sink.

And it was great fun! The sets, the costumes, the singing and dancing - all were excellent. It's an entertainment, a piece of fun escapism, and its foolish to expect it to be anything but that. What it does, it does very well and I thoroughly enjoyed it. And so did everyone else judging from the applause and standing ovation.

The stars are Patina Miller as Deloris the disco singer hiding away in the convent, with Sheila Hancock as Mother Superior and Ian Lavender as the local priest (who's cassocks became ever more sparkly). Chris Jarman as Shank, the baddie, was superbad and got booed when it came to bows at the end, which he seemed to love, Julia Sutton was excellent as the feisty old nun with a nice line in rapping, and Katie Rowley Jones was good as the young nun who doesn't know whether she wants to stay or go. I thought they were all great fun, and the baddie's cronies had a nice Moments and Whatnauts moment with their seduction song ripping off 'Girls' to good effect.

The message is: don't mess with nuns!

There was a goodly array of merchandise to choose from but I restricted myself to a programme and the cast recording (even Sheila Hancock sounds good).

It's not high art but it's great fun. Last night the audience seemed to be made up of overseas school groups on a trip to London and older women on coach trips to the theatre - the place was full. If you want a fun night out, lots of big songs and lots of dancing, some comic moments and some sentimentality, then go and see it!

'Shirley Valentine' at The Menier Chocolate Factory

On Saturday afternoon we ventured up to London Bridge to see the matinee of 'Shirley Valentine' at the Menier Chocolate Factory starring Meera Syal. It's playing in repertory with another Willy Russell play, 'Educating Rita', and both have just opened. It's nice to see new seating in the Choccy Factory which is much more comfortable than the usual padded benches.

I've seen the film of 'Shirley Valentine' (with Pauline Collins) but never seen the play on stage so it was a pleasant surprise to realise it was actually a one-woman play with Shirley - Meera - speaking directly to the audience for the whole play. At least when she wasn't talking to the Wall or the Rock. Meera comes on stage into the kitchen set and starts talking to us, telling us about her life and family, drinking a glass of white wine to help the day flow and casually makes chips and fried eggs for her husband's dinner, and she does make the dinner on stage. We gradually learn that somewhere along the line the vibrant human being called Shirley Valentine has married, become domestic, had children and lost that spark of life that makes her a unique human being. Shirley is 42 and life has passed her by. But her friend, Brummy Jane, has bought her a ticket to Corfu for a holiday ... and the second half is set on the beach in Corfu where Shirley rediscovers the glorious human being who is Shirley Valentine.

Meera is excellent. You'd expect her to get the comedy lines and timing just right but I found the introspective sections very moving, when she realises her age and wonders where her life has gone and how little she seems to have lived. When she lowered her voice you could have heard a pin drop, we all hung on her next word. She could have made us laugh or cry with a few words, and that's a powerful actress with a powerful script and the ability to hold us all in the palm of her hand and keep us there for the duration of the play. I was very impressed.

Of course, there were some downsides. Like the kitchen set which was a perfect mid-80s recreation except it looked a lot like mine ... the cupboards were the same as I have in my kitchen. I need to upgrade at some point but thanks for rubbing it in! The other is that I'm going to be the cause of her divorce. I swear that when Meera was talking about meeting her holiday romance on Corfu and repeating him saying 'You think I want to make fuck with you' that she was looking right at me. Perhaps it's because I was stroking my beard at the time (does she have a beard fetish?) but I have no doubt I was the focus of that scene... Sorry Sanjeev!

There were some unscheduled light moments too, like when Meera walked to the back of the stage when it's laid out as a beach and something went *crack* and Meera quipped, quick as you please, 'Oops, I think I've killed something' looking at her foot. The audience was in gales of laughter at that. And at the end while we're applauding and she directs some of the applause to the Rock at the front of the stage.

I thoroughly enjoyed the play and enjoyed Meera's performance. I'd happily go again. The play is on for a month or so so get tickets while you can - runs at the Choccy Factory tend to sell out quite quickly so do yourself a favour and buy tickets now.

Thanks Meera!

Alphabeat at The Garage

This evening we went to The Garage to see the shiny poptastic Alphabeat. This was one of those 'buy our new CD from HMV and get a free ticket' type of gigs and there's always a question mark around the value of a free ticket. Walking in we were greeted with dry ice, purple and blue lights and a peculiar smell.

The place was half-full, which was a bit of a disappointment, but also good for us since it meant the evening was much more comfortable, particularly for Chris who could sing and dance along to his pop group of choice. I worry about Anders SG since he has a strange habit of slapping himself (instead of clapping) and banging his tamourine off his body, rather odd behaviour while he bounces around on stage.

They played nine songs over 40 minutes (including the encore) before leaving because Stine was feeling poorly. They put on a good show but I can't help but feel that their last two songs were their best - 'The Spell' ended the set and the extended version of 'Fascination' was the encore.

Mary J Does Led Zep

I'm a late-comer to the Mary J Blige party. I went with Chris to see her at the O2 a couple of years ago, curious as to what I might see and hear and in the space of two hours she converted me and I've been exploring her work ever since.

Mary J's new album, 'Stronger withEach Tear' has just been released in the UK and seems to be getting mixed reviews. I'm just listening to it for the first time and it works for me, a mix of styles and sounds unified by her voice and themes. The surprising thing is that it includes TWO Led Zeppelin covers - 'Whole Lotta Love' and 'Stairway To Heaven'. What's that about? Is there some kind of Led Zep revival going on that no-one's told me about (not that I'd care too much, to be honest). Mary J with two songs on the album, Pink playing a Led Zep in the 'Funhouse' tour ... what next? And can I say that I *love* her version of 'Whole Lotta Love'? She takes it to places it's never been before and her performance is flawless.

I need to listen to the album again to get a proper feel for it but I'm enjoying it on a first listen. Give it a try.

An abiding memory is seeing MJB give the performance of her life with 'No More Drama' at The O2, draining me of emotion, down on her knees and singing her heart out. The video is powerful too.

Laura Marling - 'I Speak Because I Can''

Laura Marling's new album was released yesterday and I picked it up this evening on the way home - I am *seriously* impressed. Well crafted and mature songs delivered with confidence by someone who's just turned 20 - and this is her second album.

I've just looked on Last.fm and she's had nearly 6 million listens. That's big time. Have you heard of her? If not, you should. It's been about two years since her first album but it's well worth the wait. The video for the new single. 'Rambling Man' is on her website.

Go on, take a look/listen:

Patti Smith at Foyles, Southbank

This afternoon I met Patti Smith. She was doing a signing of her new book, 'Just Kids', about her and Robert Mapplethorpe in the 70s, at Foyles on the Southbank underneath the Royal Festival Hall. A few minutes after I met Chris outside the shop who should amble over but Patti Smith herself with her camera and took a photo of the window display before being ushered into the shop. I managed to get a photo of Patti's back as she walked into the shop. And then Dawn arrived, just missing the slight excitement.

We bought the book and got a number for the signing queue and then went upstairs to the Royal Festival Hall for a sit down and drink to pass some time until the signing. Half an hour later the shop was mobbed with people standing in a vague queue so we roughly found our places and waited. And waited.

Shortly before the advertised time, Patti went to the microphone at the front of the shop and said a few words of welcome. I was so far back I couldn't see her at all. Then she sang three songs, just her on guitar and vocals for the first song, 'Grateful', then she read a short passage from the book about 'Because The Night' and then sang it unaccompanied except for the crowd joining in for the chorus, followed by 'My Blakean Year', again with herself on guitar. I couldn't see a thing so I leaned on a bookshelf and just listened.

And then the signing started. After what seemed ages, the queue started moving and we were soon at the front. I had my camera out and Patti asked if I wanted to take a photo - I, of course, said 'yes' and the photo is below. She signed the book to me with a big smile, happy to give me my few seconds with her before moving on. And I was happy with my few seconds.

That was Patti Smith y'know.

And, y'know what? She gives good signing. The songs and signing started at 3pm and, when we wandered back along the Southbank at 5pm, Patti was still there signing. She's playing live tomorrow night but the gig sold out before I could get tickets.

I think back to seeing her perform the album 'Horses' at the Royal Festival Hall in 2005 (when she introduced me to The Dresden Dolls) and a couple of years later at The Roundhouse when she shouted into the audience, 'You're not afraid of a fucking pop song, are ya?' and launched into 'Rock'n'Roll Nigger'. The Roundhouse gig was magnificent. I also think back to buying her albums in the '70s and wondering who this exotic creature was. And today, I met her.

Swapsies

It seems like there's a game of swapsies going on between the West End and Broadway. Or at least swapsies with shows I've seen in New York.

We send over 'A Little Night Music' from the tiny Choccy Factory to Broadway and it reciprocates with 'Hair'. It then sends over 'Fela!', the show about Fela Kuti and his afrobeat sound which I'm told will open at the National Theatre in November. I'll be there.

That just leaves 'South Pacific' and (ahem) 'Next To Normal'. The former is brilliant, the latter less so.

Still, I'm looking forward to welcoming the hippies from 'Hair' to these shores - we need a new love generation (maaan). Buy tickets now!

'Beautiful Darling' at the NFT

This evening we went to see 'Beautiful Darling' at the National Film Theatre, a new documentary film about Candy Darling. If you haven't heard of her, she was one of Andy Warhol's film superstars and subject of one of the verses of Lou Reed's 'Walk On The Wild Side' - that should help you place her in context. But, to paraphrase Lou Reed, she was a he.

The film is clearly a labour of love from Jeremiah Newton who was Candy's friend back in the '60s and early '70s before she died of cancer at the age of 29 in 1974. The film is set around the rather odd premise of Jeremiah burying Candy's ashes along with those of his mother who recently died. The film looks back at Candy's short life, a boy in the suburbs of Long Island who reinvents himself as Candy Darling in New York in the mid-'60s and she goes on to become an actress of stage and screen.

It includes film clips and interviews with a wide range of people, from Jayne County (formerly Wayne County of Electric Chairs fame) and Penny Arcade to clips of interviews with Andy Warhol and even footage of a young Lou Reed. She was a staple of the early Factory films and a glamour-puss to boot. Her delicate bone structure only needed a hint of make-up to transform her, and blond hair completed the transformation.

The film included excerpts from her diary and letters which, if they're representative, indicate a very literate and thoughtful person, very self-aware that she is her own creation. I'll need to track down a copy of her diary, I think. The film ends with a quote from Candy: 'There is one thing I must tell you because I just found it to be truth...You must always be yourself no matter what the price. It is the highest form of morality.'

Jeremiah was on hand to do a Q&A after the film and he sounds like a nice guy with a whole history himself. The film was obviously a labour of love for him, keeping Candy's name and memory alive and supporting the hard choices of transgendered people. In the normal, run of the mill, lives most of us live it's nice to know there are some exotic creatures out there who we will probably never understand or meet, but who find another way to live. I don't want to find another way to live - I'm quite happy with what I have at the moment - but I admire those brave souls who live life on their own terms.

I don't know if there are any plans to release the film more widely but do go and see it if you get the chance. It's on in London for a couple of days, I think, and then plays in New York as part of a film festival. Hopefully you won't be subjected to an enhanced 12" remix of the Velvet's 'Venus In Furs' before and after the film.

'Mrs Warren's Profession' at The Comedy Theatre

This evening we went to see 'Mrs Warren's Profession' at the Comedy Theatre off Leicester Square, an old theatre with the stage and stalls so far underground that you could hear the tube trains rattling in the depths. The audience was also rather old and deeply home counties. But that's ok because Felicity Kendal was the star of the show. I've been a fan of Felicity since I fell in love with her as Barbara Good in 'The Good Life' oh so many decades ago.

I'm not a big Shaw fan and his plays always feel very wordy - why use 10 words if 20 will make it longer? It's the tale of Mrs Warren who is a rich madam with 'hotels' dotted around Europe and her Cambridge-educated daughter who has no idea what her mother does or where the money comes from. Until, that is, the mother comes clean about her past, her humble origins and how she and her sister used their charms to build a business. What she doesn't explain is that the business is still thriving and that's what causes a rift between mother and daughter, with the daughter heading off to London to make her own way in the world. There's a love interest (of course) and other characters, but that's the nub of the story. The play is about money and capitalism, about society's double-standards, about the rotten core of the upper classes, about dignity and morality. Oh, it's about lots of things.

The cast was excellent - they've been on tour so are well rehearsed and knit together well. The leading roles are Felicity as Mrs Warren and Lucy Briggs-Owen as her daughter, played with a rather brittle exterior that doesn't let you see the churning emotion beneath. It was great to finally see Felicity on stage and she played the part with a mix of knowing cocquettishness and middle aged world weariness - until the final scene when she announced she couldn't give up her job since she craved the excitement of it, and that summed up her character and explains the flashes of anger or annoyance she displays at various points during the play.

Some of the twists and turns of the plotting were a bit obvious but, then again, the play has probably been plagiarised quite a bit over the years so I can forgive that. It was also a brave attempt at the time at an early feminist tract - how else could a woman make money except by selling her body? I'm sure there were lots of other ways, but this is the obvious (and most theatrical) one.

I enjoyed it and wished we'd been closer to the stage. The staging was a bit awkward with long lulls between acts (which seemed odd since the changes to the set weren't that drastic) but that's ok. Most thing are ok when you know you're going to see Felicity. She did good swish of her floor length skirts (knocking over a chair at one point - now, that's good swish!), much better than the men in the mandatory late-Victorian linen suits.